Are you even paying attention to what is happening in my life? Are you even there, God? It seems as though you have abandoned me, yet I know that You have always proven yourself faithful. The problem is that I cannot see where you are right now.
There are so many - too many- times I have been wounded and abused, attacked or experienced deep tragedy, and you have been there. But I always ever only see you in the aftermath when all is said and done. It's not that I do not feel your peace or the sweetness of your care, it's that I think I am looking for resolution instead of being patient for you to reveal yourself to me in the midst of pain and long suffering.
I'm the one with the problem. Maybe I have abandoned you, forgotten you, struggled to trust you. Yes, I think that is it. Help me, Lord Jesus, to really trust. After all these years, after all this time, I am still unworthy and proven to have a wandering heart. Forgive me for my lack of faith. Bring me back to you in full. Hear my prayer. Restore me please. I want to see you at work again.